Hey Dolls!
My team and I are working on filing all of season 11′s #KUWTKE posts onto Tumblr in the coming week. I also have a surprise that I’ve been working on for you all!
In the meantime, catch up with the posts over at Jezebel.
Chat Soon,
Mariah <3
Hi Dolls!
Check out the latest post on Gawker! It will be reposted here, along with the last few posts from Season 10 later this week.
Moving forward, be sure to watch this space each week for updates and stay tuned for some very special surprises! I’m working a a little something special, so also send me any questions you may have about my process writing the blog or any other Kardashian specific things.
Chat soon!
Mariah
Hi!
The newest re-cap is up on Gawker. See you in a couple of days for the #repost. #TellBubbaAboutMe
<3
Mariah
Hello again, dolls! The break has been fab, but I’ve got a new outfit, new notebook, and new errors, and I’m ready for the first day of school. There’s no time like the present to get to work, so let’s dive in and uncover all we missed over the summer. We can kiss when it’s done. #LetsHitIt
On Sunday night’s episode, our A-plot was Kim and Khloe’s trip to Armenia, our B-Plot was Kylie’s teenage ways, and our C-plot was Kris Jenner’s sadness. Like most things, only the Ace matters, so we’re picking the A-plot for this recap.
Scene 2:
Kim Kardashian West, of www.KimKardashianWest.com, visits her youngest Kardashian sister Khloe Kardashian (née Odom, née Kardashain), of www.KhloeWithAK.com in Khloe’s closet. Armed with day old fro-yo, Kim asks Khloe about their upcoming trip to Armenia. Khloe is packing, and Kim reminds her to pack for colder weather and conservatively because they will be bringing a lot of attention to the country. Khloe predicts that she, Kim, North and Kanye will “rule that town.” Khloe’s prediction and Kim’s eating of sprinkled fro-yo were filmed on May 10, 2015.
Scene 3:
At her own home, Khloe gets a visit from Kris Jenner. Kris Jenner, arrives frenzied and pressed to force Rob into going to Armenia with his sisters who leave that night. Khloe reminds her mom that she told her he was not going. Khloe tells Kris that it would be great if Rob could join them, but they don’t want to force the issue. We’re super proud of Khloe because forcing the issue seven weeks after the trip had taken place would have been a travesty. This scene was filmed on June 30, 2015, nearly two months after Khloe began packing for, and presumably went to, Armenia.
Scene 4:
The most famous Armenian girls in the world finally touch down in Yerevan, Armenia. They are joined by notable musician and fashion designer, Kanye West, along with his child kin, North West. Immediately upon arrival, Kim, Khloe, Kanye, and North are greeted with song, bread, and what appears to be every single person who was free in Armenia that night. What’s even more impressive is the spectacular manipulation of time both Kim and Khloe were able to create. Instead of going to Armenia straight from Calabasas, California, Kim and Khloe visited the future, considering that they touched down in Armenia over a month before Khloe had packed a single item of clothing for the trip. This scene was filmed on April 8, 2015.
Scene 5:
All dolled up with various places to go, Kim chats with Khloe in their Armenian hotel room before they paint the town Kardashian. Kim’s face doesn’t move, but her eyes dance and her mouth tells Khloe that she’s expecting baby number two. Kim’s pregnancy news is only the secondary piece of information she has for Khloe. Kim literally sits Khloe down, and tells her now that she’s pregnant Khloe has got to step up her game and be the Sexy Kardashian. According to Kim, Kourtney is just flat out unsexy now, and what with her being pregnant, Khloe’s all they got. Gotta love family! This scene was filmed on April 9, 2015.
Scene 9:
One of Kim and Khloe’s stops in Armenia finds them at a carpet factory where they are served a private dinner, receive a private fashion show, try on traditional Armenian garments, compare themselves to storybook monkeys, and dance. Kim even took a necklace right off the body of an entertainer. Just great, simple fun. This scene was filmed on April 12, 2015.
Scene 12:
By the grace of Nori and Kim’s unborn son, Kanye West allowed the E! crew to film the pilot of his new show Keeping Up With Kanye as he visited young Armenian musicians. Per Kanye’s request, this scene was shot like Stanley Kubrick, and we got deep insight into his fears of 3D printers and the internet. What Kanye isn’t afraid of is the word, “dope,” which he said approximately 50 times, and for which we are grateful. This scene was filmed on April 9, 2015.
Scene 21:
In the final scene, Kim and Khloe visit the Armenian Genocide Memorial with Kanye and their kousins, Kourtni and Kara. It’s always comforting to see our entertainers bring attention and context to historical events, but it’s even greater to see this documented via Instagram via a full screen graphic on a cable television reality show. Thank you E! and thank you Kim Kardashian West. We remember, we Instagram. This scene was filmed on April 10, 2015.
Well, Dolls, I’ve got to Dash because that’s my time. Come see about your girl next week for another re-cap of KUWTArmenianPrincessAndKhloe on KUWTKE. #PrintedShoes
As promised, below is a little special surprise from me to you. Enjoy! See you in a few day!
Hi!
We’re back and we’re live! Head on over to Gawker for the latest post but make sure to come back later this week for the re-post and some special surprises.
Enjoy!
<3
Mariah
On Sunday Night’s episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, the A-plot was the Kardashian/Jenner kids wrapping up their Montana vacation; the B-plot was Kris Jenner following Kendall Jenner to Paris; the C-plot was Kim’s struggle to get pregnant; and the D-plot was everyone’s final night of happiness before realizing we could never slay like Caitlyn MF-ing Jenner.
In this re-cap we will refer to Caitlyn as Bruce, as this episode aired before she stunted on American civilization as we know it and officially slayed the game as Caitlyn. #LetsGo
Scene 2:
The Montana Crew is still in Montana. Kim lounges in the bed when Khloe comes in to apologize about their fight the night before. Khloe doesn’t apologize for a specific thing, but instead asks Kim to apologize for what she said. Confused, Kim chooses to apologize for saying Khloe has bad style, but doesn’t commit to the apology when she criticizes the sweats Khloe is wearing. The outfits and glam on Kim and Khloe are the same ones we will see later this episode when they leave Montana, so we know that this was filmed on February 21, 2015.
Scene 7:
Kim, Kourtney, and Jonathan play cards at their estate in Montana. Before getting down to a game of Gin, Kim recalls a Pictionary game she played with the entire Jackson family, “including Janet” when she was 15. She claims she picked the word “angel” and she drew it so well, that Jermaine and Janet were jumping up and down shouting out “angel,” winning them the point. Unfortunately for Kim, the other team saw the card and told her it was “angle,” not “angel.” So, ever since then, Kim has had a “thing” about angel/angle. It’s not all sad though, since she was given the point out of pity. Silly, Jacksons!
The trio finally play a game of Gin, and talk about Scott’s anger issues/the almost car accident earlier that day (Episode 12, Scene 25). Kourtney says she spoke with Scott earlier, and that he feels horrible about getting so angry over the situation. Kourtney doesn’t seem that affected by Scott’s rage, even though he’s been making a lot of progress recently with keeping his anger in check. An emotional flare up like this is definitely something super chill, especially when you have three young kids. So super beyond on the farthest point of chill. Kim’s stroll down name drop lane, and Kourtney’s Gin win, was filmed on February 20, 2015.
Scene 9:
Jetsetter, Kris Jenner, touches down in Paris! It’s Paris Fashion Week, so of course Kendall Jenner is there as well. The two head to lunch. Kris smiles, asks questions, and tries to engage with her child, while Kendall looks off, avoids eye contact, and answers with single syllables. Kendall and Kris’ lunch was filmed on January 24, 2014.
Scene 13:
Reeling from their crazy fun lunch, Kris Jenner and Kendall Jenner enjoy dinner in Paris. Kris compliments Kendall’s bangs in a recent Vogue spread, and Kendall huffs and puffs that contrary to what her text messages say, bangs are not her thing. Sensing Kendall’s agitation, Kris tries to steer the conversation away from Kendall’s non-existent bangs.
In one of the saddest moments in KUWTK history, Kris asks budding supermodel, Kendall Jenner if she knows who Twiggy is. Kris, a woman who claims to have raised smart, able-minded, critical thinking, successful, children, asks one of said children if she knows an icon within her field of work. Thankfully Kendall knows who Twiggy is, or according to her hand motion, she knows the CliffsNotes version: eyelashes.
Kris tells Kendall that she’s excited for London Fashion Week, and this sets Kendall off. Like a moth drawn to an expensive flame, Kris just can’t let her kids be and they hate it. Kendall gets real emotional and tells her mom, “let me miss you.” WOW. We need this etched out in a cursive font with a Lo-Fi Instagram filter, so we can re-post it with the tiny cough emoji to coyly grab the attention of our love interests. Kendall’s monologue about love, goodbyes, and the art of feelings was filmed on January 24, 2015, the same day she and Kris went to lunch in Scene 9.
Scene 14:
The Montana Crew is still in Montana, and they all listen in on a phone call between Kim and her psychic, John Edward. He’s a close friend, and one of Kim’s advisors, so she calls to ask about her chances of getting pregnant. He tells her that she can’t stress about conceiving, but instead needs to visualize walking with a child and North playing with a younger sibling. John also tells Kim to focus on energy, and know that when the energy is right for Kim and Kanye to be that child’s parents, it will happen. Also, astrologically, the time has to be right. Kim’s psychic phone call was filmed on February 18, 2015.
Scene 16:
The Montana Crew finally packs up and leaves Montana. Kim is in a rush to get out of the state because she has a doctor’s appointment that she can’t miss scheduled for soon after they land in California. In the rush to get everyone out of the house and onto the plane, Khloe, Kylie, Kim and North leave ahead of the group.
Unfortunately, a truck passing them blows snow onto their SUV, which knocks the car onto black ice and sends it spinning into oncoming traffic. Thankfully for the future of KUWTKE, Khloe got control of the car and they skidded into a ditch and were safe. Everyone is shaken up, but Kim is far more emotional than her sisters. She calls Kanye and uses “I Statements” to tell him what happened in the accident and how it affected her. Kim says “our,” “we,” and “us” one time, and “North” zero times. Kim, we’re happy that you’re okay! Kim’s car accident was filmed on February 21, 2015.
Scene 20:
At Kourtney’s house, Kourtney, Khloe, and Scott talk about breastfeeding other people’s children. Kim arrives in her (then) new bleach blonde look. Kourtney asks the group if they heard about Bruce’s upcoming surgery. Khloe makes a “yes” noise, and no one else responds. We assume it’s because the group is tuckered out from filming for five months, as this appears to be the final day on production on the first half of Season 10 for Scott, Kourtney, and Khloe. This scene was filmed on March 13, 2015.
Scene 21:
Kim visits her doctor, Dr. Rosen, to see how close she is to ovulating. She’s told that she’ll be ovulating in about 4 days, on a Saturday. Even though Kim is “over it” when it comes to stressing about getting pregnant, Dr. Rosen tells Kim to come back on Friday so that they can give her a trigger shot, and then 6 days later Kim can complete another round of IVF. Because Dr. Rosen is so thorough, we can confidently say that this filmed on March 17, 2015.
This was the first Tuesday of March that Kim was in Los Angeles with blonde hair. The Friday following was March 20, 2015, meaning Kim would have gotten her trigger shot then, and embryos would have been implanted on or around March 26, 2014, 13 days before Kim told Khloe she was pregnant on April 9, 2015 in Armenia (in the teaser, both Kim and Khloe are in this glam when when Kim “announces” her pregnancy). This means Baby #2 was conceived in late March and Kim is looking at a December delivery*. Congrats, Kim! We are really looking forward to this!
*When originally posted on Gawker, our math was a bit off. We didn’t want to tell you all this, but we flunked out of Med School. Our biggest issue was being 100% unqualified and our secondary issue was mathematics. Please keep our future educational endeavors in your thoughts.
Well, Dolls, turn up that Vitamin C and think of me at night. These past 13 weeks have been a blast and I can’t wait to share some more Kontinuty Errors with you all later this month. Stay tuned to this space for more KUWCaitlyn Jenner’s acquaintances re-caps/updates on KUWTKE! #LetMeMissYou
On Sunday Night’s episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, the A-plot was the family’s yearly vacation; the B-plot was Khloe and Kylie bonding; and the C-plot was Kim’s stinginess. Follow me, and let’s go!
Scene 2:
Kourtney, Khloe, Kendall, and Kylie all head out for a casual dinner. After Kylie explains a nightmare she had where she kept waking up saying “Kourtney,” Kourtney urges the table to all seriously think about going to therapy. She finds it helpful because in their family they’re all so busy that they “can’t think about what’s happening sometimes.” Kendall doesn’t have an issue with therapy, but Kylie does. Kylie feels that you shouldn’t go to therapy “unless you’re the one asking for it,” so she won’t be going. When speaking to the camera in a confessional during this scene, Kourtney says that her mention of therapy is due in part to Bruce’s transition being public. Very curious, since this was filmed on November 17, 2014; 5 months before Bruce officially went public with his transition on 4/24/15, and about 2 months before all the girls even learned Bruce was going to transition on 1/19/15.
Scene 3:
At Khloe’s house, Khloe and Kim play with a pair of binoculars that belonged to their father, Robert Kardashian Sr. Once the two are done looking at close range things with with a far range optical device, Kim sighs that she “just wants to go skiing.” Khloe doesn’t think it’s “aligned in the cards” for them to do a big family trip this year because there’s been too much craziness going on. After a quick search on her phone, Kim decides that they should all go skiing in Big Sky, Montana. Like a race of words, both Khloe and Kim boldly state that they’ve never been to Montana. Wow, short-term memory really isn’t what it used to be. This scene was filmed on February 23, 2015; two days after Kim and Khloe returned from their trip to Montana on 02/21/15.
Scene 5:
Khloe, Kourtney, Kim, Scott, Kids and Staff all board their private jet to Montana. Kourtney debuts baby Reign on KUWTK, and Kim debuts the back of North’s neck. Of course, Everybody’s Favorite Best Friend, Malika is there; and Kim’s friend Jonathan, along with Kylie, will meet them in Montana. Khloe asks Kim what the sleeping arrangements are looking like for Malika and Jonathan. Kim tells Khloe that she booked her boy Jonathan a hotel room nearby, and that Malika can either share a bed with Khloe or sleep on the couch. Khloe’s upset that Kim booked her company in a lavish hotel, but regulated Malika to a pull-out. At the end of Khloe’s day, Malika is not going on the couch, and Kim needs to figure something out quickly. This was filmed on February 18, 2015.
Scene 7:
After de-planing and caravanning to their rental, the Montana Crew pulls up to the house – pardon us, estate – that couldn’t accommodate Everybody’s Favorite Best Friend, Malika. Kimberly Noel Kardashian West, you mean to tell us that Malika couldn’t sleep in one of the five bedrooms, the “lounge by day, bunk room by night,” or the theater room? Or perhaps you could have not invited more people than you could comfortably house? Just some thoughts!
Two people who have a place to lay their heads that night, Kylie and Jonathan, arrive to the estate. Kylie immediately finds her bed and retires to it with her brown paper bag. Like Scene 5, this was filmed on February 18, 2015.
Scene 10:
The Montana Crew kicks back at the estate, laughing about familial spin the bottle, black and white double sided dildos, and one of their friends still not knowing where they will sleep later that evening. Though she wasn’t promised it, Everybody’s Favorite Best Friend, Malika, speaks her blessing and says she is going to be staying in the hotel room that night. Kim brings her back down to earth, saying that the hotel is fully booked and the only room available is the penthouse suite. But get this, even though Kim promised the room to Jonathan, the group decides that Jonathan and Malika can compete for the room with a game of charades. This episode of Always the Bridesmaid and Never the Bride, Even Though Our Best Friends Are Multi-Millionaires With A Lot of Influence was filmed on February 18, 2015.
Scene 11:
Jonathan comes to see Kim in her room, and asks her if the rumors about Bruce are true. When Kim confirms that what he’s heard is correct, Jonathan asks a lot of follow up questions to last week’s episodes. In short: the family is adjusting, Bruce is very happy, the family has each other, and everyone will be alright. This very informative and not at all contrived conversation was filmed on February 20, 2015.
Scene 12:
The Montana Crew plays charades to see if Everybody’s Favorite Best Friend, Malika or Jonathan gets a bed. With Khloe on Jonathan’s team and Kim on Malika’s, this seems like a very fair, diplomatic game. After a few rounds, Jonathan wins the room and asks Malika to get his bags for him. Malika, good sis: Dash Dolls got picked up! You don’t have to do this anymore! RUN!!! Malika’s loss was filmed on February 18, 2015.
Scene 14:
Kylie and Khloe get ready to hit the slopes, and Kylie mentions a tram she wants to go on that takes you to the highest peak of the mountain. Khloe is terrified, but goes because it’s going to make Kylie happy. They have to take multiple trams to get to the top of the mountain, which isn’t even visible from lower peaks. Luckily for Khloe, the conditions are too bad for them to go all the way up, so they have to ditch this plan. Khloe and Kylie (try to) Take the Highest Peak was filmed on February 20, 2015.
Scene 17:
After their failed attempt at skiing on the highest peak, Kylie calls Khloe into her room to talk about heli-skiing/boarding. In her confessional, Kylie says she’s determined to go to the highest peak since the tram ride didn’t work out in Scene 14. Oddly enough, Kylie asks Khloe to go heli-skiing before they even rode the trams, because this was filmed on February 18, 2015, the same day the Montana Crew arrived, and before they did any skiing at all.
Scene 21:
Kylie and Khloe go heli-skiing. Khloe is panicking, and Kylie is chilling like she does this everyday. After hopping off the helicopter, Kylie and Khloe engage in some winter sports on the mountain. Khloe has some difficulties staying upright, but eventually gathers herself for a nice time with Kylie. Khloe and Kylie (actually) Take the Highest Peak was filmed on February 19, 2015, the day before they couldn’t make it to the top of the mountain via trams in Scene 14. Their intuition must be out of this world!
Scene 23:
Khloe plays pool with Jonathan and asks him to apologize to Everybody’s Favorite Best Friend, Malika for being rude to her. Apparently, Jonathan told Malika she was jealous of him because he snagged the more famous friend. Jonathan clarifies his comments, and claims he said that he got the hotel room because Kim was more famous than Khloe. Ahhh, much better. Kim adds on to Jonathan’s comment, saying she took care of her friend and expected Khloe to do the same for Malika. Khloe’s now pissed, because Kim booked the estate without telling her there wouldn’t be room for Malika. Kim isn’t having it and accuses Malika and Khloe of having an inferiority complex and insinuates that Khloe keeps Malika around to showboat and entertain her. Kim, don’t be fucking rude! This scene where Kimberly Noel Kardashian West, mother of a biracial child, accused a black woman of putting on a show for a white woman and calling it friendship, was filmed on February 20, 2015; the same night the Montana Crew celebrated Jonathan’s birthday.
Scene 25:
Scott is driving Jonathan, Malika, Kourtney and Khloe when he gets caught behind an SUV that keeps hitting the brakes. Scott, caught between this SUV and a 16-wheeler, almost has a major accident when the SUV stops abruptly, nearly causing the 16-wheeler to rear-end his car. Scott is PISSED so he pulls up next to the SUV, yells, and spits. Due to proximity and what we believe to be physics, the spit does not land on the driver of the other SUV, but on Jonathan. Oh well. This was filmed on February 20, 2015.
That’s it for today, dolls! See you next week for our mid-season finale KUWTSnow Bunnies re-cap on KUWTKE. #DontBeFuckingRude
Before we get to tracking errors, I want to thank some people who have helped make KUWTKE a success.
A big thank you to Ashley Butkowski - my amazing graphic designer who made my gorgeous logo! Ashley, you’re a true queen and everything you touch turns to gold.
Another thank you to my phenomenal editors Lauren Smith and Rachel Smith. If it were not for them, KUWTKE would be nonexistent. I know it’s only a blog, but you both inspire me to make this the best blog it can possibly be. I’m so honored that you each take the time every week to look over my tiny words, it means more to me than you know!
I also have to thank all of the people who have promoted KUWTKE in the press. Everything with that is wonderful and well and lovely.
And finally, I want to thank everyone who takes the time to read KUWTKE. I’m so happy you’re all enjoying it!
-Mariah
On Sunday and Monday night’s episodes of Keeping Up With the Kardashians: About Bruce, the A-plot was Bruce’s transition; the B-plot was the KUWTKE staff picking up their emotionally drained bodies off the floor; and the C-plot was Kim Kardashian’s mission to come for every Civil Rights activist’s wig.
Like episodes in the past: KUWTKE will refer to Bruce using male pronouns until he decides to publicly slay the madam/sis/queen/female pronoun game. #LetsDoIt
Scene 1/Cold Open:
At Khloe’s house, Kim visits and watches Khloe pack presents for Bruce. Thankfully, after 10 long seasons, E! finally put chyrons up to let us know who Kim and Khloe were! We were so confused this whole time! Khloe got Bruce shoes, because he told her “She” doesn’t have enough. That may be true and all, but we really hope the jumping off point isn’t a a red patent leather, ankle strap pump or a mid-calf, lace-up, black leather boot. This was filmed on January 7, 2015.
Scene 2:
Khloe visits confirmed Republican Bruce Jenner at his house in Malibu. E! gifted us with another chyron, showing the actual, real, live date this scene was filmed!! As per E!’s gift, we know this was filmed on January 13, 2015.
Khloe has her gifts for Bruce but admits that she doesn’t know Her tastes yet. Bruce says he doesn’t really know Her tastes either. He’s beyond appreciative of Khloe’s gesture, and opens the gifts. The great news for Bruce is that Khloe went back to the drawing board and got Her some sleeker and better looking heels that even match Khloe’s.
Kendall arrives, and Khloe gets down to some serious talk. She asks Bruce if he feels better now that more people know about his - as Khloe understands it at this time - desire to dress like a woman. Bruce tells his daughters that it’s like a burden has been lifted.
Scene 3:
Still at Bruce’s house, Kendall leaves to get a tissue, and Khloe follows her into the kitchen. Bruce comes in shortly after. Bruce tries to reiterate that that he’s not abandoning them, and that he’s not going anywhere. Khloe interjects and tells him that his lack of honesty is hurting them. Before she can say too much, Bruce gives Khloe the honesty she’s seeking and says he really only cares about Kendall and Kylie’s emotions. Welp. Had it not been for the Tribal Council music playing in the background, you could have heard one of Her ponytail holders drop in Bruce’s kitchen.
Khloe when she finds out Bruce doesn’t eff with her emotions.
Kendall when she finds out Bruce effs with her emotions, but not Khloe’s.
Choosing to move forward, Khloe tells Bruce that they’re all passionate and emotional. She advises him to hold a family meeting with his children. He agrees. Like Scene 2, this was filmed on January 13, 2015.
Scene 4:
Kim visits Bruce, with what looks like North’s purse. Bruce tells Kim that the pervious night Kendall and Khloe were over, and their communication was AWOL. Though Kim is understanding of Bruce’s hesitations, she just asks that he keep the family “in the loop.” Bruce understands, but he says it’s tough, because he has a lot of secrets.
On the subject of secrets, Bruce shows Kim his impeccably painted toe nails. Unsurprisingly, Kim is shocked. Bruce tells Kim he does all his own glam, and claims he could even do hers. Kim laughs like a Sephora employee just offered to contour her face, and visually tells Bruce, “bitch you could never.”
Though he’s had his issues in the past few scenes, Bruce says he’s ready to be fully honest with the family. Kim’s heard rumors, and asks Bruce if he’s going to fully become a woman. Bruce pauses, says yes, and that he sees himself in the future that way. As a 2007 Summa Cum Laude graduate of Media Training University (MTU), Kim tells Bruce that in order to not seem like a liar, he needs to not hesitate when answering that question. According to Kim, all it takes is 4 seconds to seem like a liar, or like you’re wildin’, depending on the company you keep. Bruce also tells Kim that he’s made the “appointment” for his changes, and that he’s going to be interviewed by the Queen Mother Good Sis. Diane Sawyer. The impetus behind his interview is that he doesn’t want the tabloids to control his story or exploit his family. Yassss, “I HAD THE STORY,” yasss!!!
Kim when she hears Diane Sawyer’s name.
Even though E!’s date chyron budget was spent on Scene 2, we know that this was filmed on January 14, 2014; the day after Bruce’s chat with Khloe and Kendall, and the same day Kim spoke highly of honesty in Episode 9, Scene 15.
Scene 5:
Kim visits Kris at Kris Jenner’s house. Apparently, all this emotion has caused Kris to take to her bed in silk pajamas and a full face of make-up. Present enough to make chatter for the cameras, Kris asks Kim how it went at Bruce’s house. Kim tells her mom that she learned some new things regarding Bruce’s “transformation,” but she still wants to support him. Kris hears that from Kim, but tears up saying she wants the kids to be okay, because she’s not. Kris Jenner, who is divorced from Bruce Jenner, says that the bulk of the reason why she’s not okay is because she’s “committed to this life.” But…divorce…papers…filed…commitment…null…void…new…boyfriend…you…have…
After Kris tries to make commitment happen, when it’s just not gonna happen, Kim compares Bruce’s transition to being pregnant. Before she can get another word out, we here in the KUWTKE offices, clutching our rosaries, drew near to the cross, and prayed our Kardashian Civil Rights representative didn’t let us down. Kim explains that when she was pregnant, she felt like a roly-poly who couldn’t get out of bed or wipe herself. Hol’up, roll the tape back: Kim explains that when she was pregnant, she felt like a roly-poly who couldn’t get out of bed or wipe herself. WE NEED TO KNOW WHO WAS WIPING KIM’S BEHIND WHEN SHE WAS WITH CHILD! WHO HAD THAT STORY, HUH BRUCE, WHO HAD IT AND WHERE IS DIANE!?!?!
Unfortunately, we digress. Kim goes on to say that she only had to feel uncomfortable and unlike herself for less than a year, and he’s had to feel that way his whole life. It’s possible Kim minored in “Left of Center but Passibly Politically Correct Analogies to Describe the Process of Transitioning” at MTU, because her comparison might have been a little off base but not entirely unfounded. MTU’s course load seems fantastic!
Scene 6:
At Kendall’s house with Kendall and Kylie, Kim takes a call from her mother Kris Jenner. Kris asks Kim if she knew about the Diane Sawyer interview. Kim says she did, but only found out the day before when she visited Bruce. Kim also tells Kris that Bruce wants her (Kim) in the meetings for the interview, as the representative for their side of the family. Kim gets off of the phone with Kris so she can update her sisters on the Diane Sawyer interview. Kim first gives some background on the publicist Bruce is working with, and it’s the same person who stopped this story from coming out in the 80s after someone “caught” Bruce with wigs and other traditionally female garments as he was travelling. This publicist told Bruce that this time around he needs to do a serious interview with a serious reporter to gain legitimacy.
Kim, caught between her support for Bruce and her love for her mom, breaks down in tears. Above all else, we need our readers to know that Kim’s cry face is proof that money and botox can’t buy you everything! #KimKardashianCryFace2015.
After looking at Kim cry, Kendall and Kylie all agree that in the future this will be a great thing for Bruce. Kendall is already in awe of his future motivational speeches. This was a busy day for Kim - this was filmed on January 15, 2015, the same day she talked to Kylie about her lips in Episode 9, Scene 16.
Scene 8:
In Malibu, Bruce gathers all of his camera friendly children together to talk more about his transition. Khloe kicks it off, and tells her sisters that she and Kendall just found out that Bruce plans to fully transition in the spring, and that he claims to have told all of them this already. Khloe’s still pissed, and her sisters confirm that they never heard that either. On the other hand, they also don’t want Bruce to feel attacked.
Bruce tries to defend himself and says he didn’t lie, he just withheld the truth. Well…a lie is…NVM. Kim just wants to start a more open dialogue with Bruce regarding his transition. The girls ask if he has an official date for his debut as Her. Bruce doesn’t, but he does know how to lighten the mood by talking about his plastic surgeries. Khloe isn’t here for it, and is seen typing on her phone. Even though E!’s date chyron budget ran out, they did have some funds set aside for a text bubble. Khloe shows Kendall what she wrote.
Bruce understands his issues with honesty when it comes to the topic of his transition, but that’s only because he loves his children so much and doesn’t ever want to hurt them. He also confesses that he can’t be sure if he’s handling this correctly, because “there’s no right way to do this.” This emotional minefield was filmed on January 19, 2015.
Scene 1:
In a continuation of
Episode 10,Scene 8, Bruce’s daughters, Kylie, Kendall, Kourtney, Khloe and Kim continue their conversation with Bruce. Bruce tells the girls that after his next facial surgeries, he’s pretty much done, and will then see how comfortable he feels living full time as Her. The conversation gets very open and honest, when Kim asks Bruce whether or not he will get a full gender reassignment surgery and if he enjoyed having sex with their mother. Bruce claims he did enjoy sexual relations with Kris Jenner.
Bruce also tells the girls that they will know when they should start referring to him as Her, because bae will be bad and there will be no mistaking Her for Bruce. His daughters cheekily suggest he start going by “Mad,” a mixture between “Mom,” and “Dad,” and because “he’s a little bit crazy.” Like Episode 10, Scene 8 this was filmed on January 19, 2015.
Scene 3:
Scott visits Bruce in Malibu to conduct a pre-interview for Diane Sawyer. Both parties admit that they’re not close, but both parties have contracts to fulfill, so here we are. After being completely in the dark for a decade, Scott has a lot of questions for Bruce. Scott asks about how butch Bruce will be as a woman, and if he will still golf. Through some more questions from Scott, Bruce admits that he wanted to move to the hills of Santa Barbara, but didn’t want to run again. Scott agrees that Bruce shouldn’t have to leave his home, and extends his wishes for a happier, more comfortable, less pissed Bruce in the future. The pre-interview concludes, and Scott is happy Bruce is transitioning, because after all of these years he thought Bruce had an issue with him, when in reality Bruce had an issue with himself. This is journalism, folks! Take notes!! This interview was filmed on February 17, 2015.
Scene 4:
At Khloe’s house, Kendall and Khloe wait for Bruce. Kendall invited him because he wants to apologize to Khloe. Wisely, Kendall asks Khloe to be nice to Bruce, since this is most likely harder on him than it is on them. Khloe agrees that she was probably too harsh on Bruce, but she was upset about his lies. In her words, Khloe was mad “that he was proceeding with something, but telling us something completely different, until we cornered him.” Um, hello, Khloe, Sis. that may as well be the tagline for us over here at KUWTKE! Like you, we act out when we’re lied to!! We can’t help it! Kendall and Khloe’s chat was filmed on January 28, 2015. Tensions must have been running high in Episode 8 when Khloe and Bruce went to Pismo Beach, only two days prior on 01/26/15.
Scene 5:
Bruce arrives and immediately asks if Khloe is okay. Khloe reiterates that he needs to be more honest, and not withhold information. Bruce understands her feelings of grief. He says that he doesn’t want to hurt anybody, but he has to honor his feelings and live his life. We completely feel Bruce on this. What we don’t feel are these transition lenses. In a very articulate moment, Bruce confesses that his love for them, and desire not to hurt them, sometimes overshadows his ability to be completely honest.
Khloe gets his emotions, but she wants him to share this journey with the family. This means a lot to Bruce. In fact, even through all the pain, he feels optimistic about the future. This is partly due to a great conversation he had with his mother earlier in the day, whom he just told about his transition. Like his relationship with Scott, Bruce had never been that close to his mother, but his admission brought them together a little more. Like Scene 4, this was filmed on January 28, 2015.
Scene 6:
At Kourtney’s house, Mason plays by a pool unattended, and Kourtney, Khloe and Scott talk about Bruce. Kourtney doesn’t want to talk too much about Bruce’s transition in front of Mason, because she doesn’t quite know how to approach the topic with her kids. Khloe thinks that’s pretty ridiculous. Khloe tells Kourtney and Scott that Kendall was at a comedy show the night before, and a comedian asked about Bruce from the stage. They acknowledge that that’s going to happen a lot, for better or for worse, and this is another reason why Khloe thinks they should talk to Mason sooner rather than later. This was filmed January 22, 2015.
Scene 7:
At Kris Jenner’s house, Kris prepares one waffle. While she cooks, Bruce arrives to talk about “this whole thing that’s going on.” Bruce wants to clear things up with Kris after hearing rumors, so he came directly to the source. Before Bruce even starts a conversation, Kris starts to tear up.
Bruce starts by saying that he doesn’t want to negate any of Kris’ emotions, or diminish any of the memories they’ve shared in the past or will share in the future. Kris listens to Bruce, but says she still doesn’t get this process because he was never fully honest with her. Kris claims she never knew about the hormones, but according to Bruce’s Diane Sawyer interview, she did.
Not one to look like a fool on TV, Kris packs her bags, books two one way tickets, and treats Bruce to a guilt trip. Per Kris’ memories, these conversations, regarding Bruce’s gender identity were never had during their marriage. She claims that he was only upset all the time and told her she would never understand why. Kris says that’s why they got a divorce, not because he wanted to transition, but because he wasn’t honest, which prohibited him from being loving. Though Bruce had been on hormones prior to their marriage and Kris knew of his desire to dress like a woman, Kris says she never saw his transition coming in a “gazillion years.”
Bruce apologizes to Kris, if she feels he wasn’t honest enough, and for hurting her. Kris admits that she just misses Bruce, and needs to mourn the relationship. Bruce tells her that things may change, but he’s not going anywhere. He still wants them to be a part of each other’s lives. Kris tells Bruce that the best thing he can do now, is live the happiest life he could ever live, and finally find the peace he’s been searching for. Make it plain, Rev. Kris Jenner, make it plain for the people!!
They conclude their conversation with some “I love yous” and hugs. Like Scene 1, this was filmed on January 19, 2015.
Scene 8:
Kim visits Bruce in Malibu, and he is overjoyed to thank her for defending him in the press the previous day. After this little moment, Kim tells Bruce that she is ready to go through Her clothes to see what needs to stay and go. Before even looking at the garments, Kim looks at the sizes and comments on Bruce being a size 14.
Kim gives her top picks and tells Bruce the things he needs to trash. Like she does for North, Kim throws out all the pieces of color in Bruce’s closet. Bruce tells Kim that he stole one of her outfits (bet now you’re upset you told the world he was a size 14, okayyyy), Bruce produces the outfit, and it’s literally a black cotton shirt. Well, Bruce, that’s not an “outfit” that’s a pretty basic “basic.” Kim tells Bruce he can keep it, and puts some outfits together out of his remaining clothes.
Bruce appreciates Kim’s help as his new “stylist” and she tells him it’s not a problem, but don’t go around town calling her his stylist because Kim doesn’t know if She can pull her weight in the wardrobe department just yet. If we were Bruce we wouldn’t be so quick to call Kim our stylist either, because she left these shoes in his closet. This was filmed on January 27, 2015.
If only goodbyes were as sweet as hellos! Luckily for you all, I’ll be back next week for another KUWDiane Sawyer’s Interviewee re-cap on KUWTKE! #WeIntheMFHouse